


Flirting With Disaster

by JessaLRynn



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst and Humor, Episode: s01e06 Dalek, F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-14
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-03-08 07:02:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3199880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessaLRynn/pseuds/JessaLRynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"A little voice inside the Master's head pointed out that destroying the Doctor would make the rest of eternity a very, very boring place, but it was quickly drowned out by the all encompassing sound of drums."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel/gifts).



> A/N: This fic was written for a Support Stacie Author Auction fic for TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel (aceofannwn ) She got a 1000-word fic. I fail at 1000 words. Her prompt was fantastic - Nine meets the Simm!Master. I could not help it. The fic is, therefore, an AU. Beyond that, I don't want to spoil it for you.

The missing TARDIS materialized at last, and the Master grinned with intense satisfaction. Success! Even the end of the Universe, even twenty-five years trapped inside a fob watch, even a human mind and an ancient, feeble body couldn't hold him!

He had his identity back, and a new regeneration, and now his freedom materialized into existence just beyond his reach. Perfect.

His first mission, after turning these infuriating, so-called "future-kind" into hand puppets, would be to get an idea of what happened with the War. Given that the Universe was still here to end, the Master had to assume that the Daleks hadn't won after all. So much for the Doctor's hysterical sermons.

And, speaking of the devil, finding him would definitely be the next priority. A little voice inside the Master's head pointed out that destroying the Doctor would make the rest of eternity a very, very boring place, but it was quickly drowned out by the all encompassing sound of drums.

He patted the dark, sinister, heavily armed console of his old TARDIS and wondered what kinds of advances were available now, given the massive influx of war technology. Last he'd heard, they were threatening to take that old Type-40 to bits to find out how it managed some of the stunts it insisted on pulling.

Of course, anyone who'd ever stolen the thing could've told them: it had an unnatural affection for its neurotic pilot, and a tendency to do absolutely anything to keep him in the minimum number of pieces. The Master really hoped the War was over and the Doctor had won, because if he'd somehow managed to lose his TARDIS without getting killed, there was no telling what kind of crazy the younger Time Lord would be. He was almost certain that a crazy Doctor would be several kinds of very, very bad.

"Oooh, look," the Master exclaimed gleefully, "there's a TARDIS on the scan now. Don't tell me; let me guess! Earth, right?" He found himself applauding like he'd won a game show when the guess turned out correctly. Apparently, this new body of his came with enthusiasm as well as energy. Excellent.

"Early twenty-first century, looks like… 2015. Interesting. Well, not interesting, actually. Nothing interesting in 2015 at all that I can remember! Oh well, maybe he's exploded of boredom."

The Master grinned happily to himself and, since he didn't know for sure what he was about to walk into, armed himself with the closest, most comfortable weapon: his old TCE. Then, he decided the Doctor's favorite game of confuse and conquer would be the word of the day.

The TARDIS materialized right next to that preposterous blue box, and he stepped out. "Hi, honey, I'm home!" the Master announced, grandly.

"Exterminate," came the cold, simplistic, one-word reply.

It was then that the Master discovered that all his years as a human being had also failed to remove even one of his Time War reflexes. He hit the deck as the Dalek laser flashed overhead, rolled with his momentum toward the open door of his TARDIS, and got a shot off somewhere in the middle of all that.

A short vault to the console, and he ran the scan for the nearest fully Gallifreyan lifeform. The coordinates locked in nanoseconds, and the Master's hands flew over the console, setting up the short hop with the ease of familiarity.

"What the fuck was that?" he demanded as he stomped out of the TARDIS this time.

A harsh, angry Northern accent rang out over the end of the Master's shouted question. "Can't _anything_ I kill stay dead?"

The Master found himself face to face with a tall, dark, and slightly more sinister than usual Doctor, blue-eyed and practically made of fury. Something deep inside the sandy-haired Time Lord squeaked and ran off to hide. Something else got massively turned on and clamored for whips and chains as the smell of leather filled his nostrils. Something else, and it was the something that won, admitted that the Doctor was the only one who had any idea what exactly was happening, and therefore, the politic approach was best. "General," he said. OK, so he couldn't resist a little ribbing. But the idea of his supposedly peaceable former friend having the lead the entire Time Lord army… He grinned maliciously.

The Doctor's brows arched a question and his arms folded over his chest. "If tha's how you wanna go with it, we'll do it." He leaned back over his shoulder. "Oi, you lot!"

The Master was on his knees with a face full of sub-machine guns before he could actually comprehend what had happened. "They've got guns!" he exclaimed, almost gleeful. "There are people, with guns! And they work for you! With guns! Oh, how the sanctimonious have fallen!"

"Figured if you were gonna call me General, I'd just as well show you my army. Considerin' you'd be up for a Court Martial if I were still in charge of an army with you in it."

"Now, my dear Doctor, is that any way to treat your oldest friend?" The Master wasn't about to admit that there was a part of him that was completely terrified at this point. This angry, vengeful Doctor wasn't someone he understood, expected, or knew what to do with. Sure, there were the old tricks, but it was entirely possible even those wouldn't work.

"You tried to kill me at least a dozen times," the Doctor said, both his voice and his eyes cold and flat. "You succeeded once, nearly twice. You very obviously got reconstituted with the rest of the rabble an' then ran away. I'm gonna have to go with 'not friends,' here. Count yourself lucky I don't decide you're like the rest of the Time War rubbish an' therefore not real!"

It was a complete shock. The Master astounded himself by laughing, but he was quickly very glad he'd done it. It unnerved the soldiers around him and the Doctor had to bark a sharp command at them. "He's just like that," the Doctor said, dryly. "Ever wonder why all evil blokes tend to laugh in your stories? They got the idea from this one." The Doctor nudged the Master with the toe of one very large black leather boot.

The whining little masochist in the Master's head started to dance. "Oh, I missed you, too," he said gleefully. "Can I stand up, then?"

"No," the Doctor replied blandly. "Hypnotist of your caliber? I'd have to go with 'not stupid' here, too."

"Oh, honestly," the Master said. "Let's assume you've finally gone 'round the twist like you've been threatening since you were seventeen. Then, let's assume you've decided to take over the Earth, like you were told to do when you were seven hundred or so. That is what the army's about, isn't it? You did what they told you and decided to look after the Earth on a permanent basis?"

The Doctor said absolutely nothing and the Master tried to look up to read the man's expression. The bloke with the gun to the back of his head wouldn't let him move more than about waist level. He started to laugh again, anyway, as he realized. "That's what it is, isn't it?" the Master demanded. "You won their gods-forsaken war for them and they exiled you here to say thank you. When will you ever believe me that they're just a blight on eternity that needs to be wiped out?"

The Doctor's fist was in the front of the Master's shirt and he was dangling in the air from that rather shockingly powerful grip. Apparently the Doctor hadn't just stepped out a little – he'd come completely unglued. "Just answer me this," the Master said, looking with great condescension into those raging blue eyes. "What's the distress call about then? What do you need me for? Something to do with that Dalek?"

"I didn't need you. I wasn't trying to reach you. I was trying to reach a Time Lord. Since I was the only one last I looked, I was expectin' a lecture. Just my luck even genocide can't get rid of you."

The Master felt both his hearts stuttering to a breath-snatching stop. "What?" he choked.

"Open your mind, you idiot," the Doctor suggested, giving the Master a good shake before dropping him.

"Doctor?" came a strong, curious, female voice from somewhere off to the side. "Diana said you were down here. Did it work?"

The Master looked up to see a small blonde human girl of perhaps twenty years, twenty-five at the most. She was pretty enough, the Master supposed, with a wide mouth, strong features, and dark, dark eyes. Her aura was wreathed with temporal banding, indicating not merely an experienced time traveler, but something that belonged to time itself. She was also…

He rounded on the Doctor. "Didn't you even pay attention in biology class?"

The Doctor shocked the hell out of the Master by laughing at him.


	2. Chapter 2

"No, but seriously," the Master insisted on continuing, "that is impossible."

The blonde girl looked at him with a bright, cheeky grin. "What? You never seen a pregnant human before?"

"Not one that smells like him from here," the Master shot back. "You cannot be pregnant. Time Lords are sterile."

That cheeky human just snickered and put a hand on her rather huge belly. "You hear that, baby?" she said. "Your daddy's sterile." She looked up and met the Master's eye again. "We had this conversation 'bout ten months ago. Was interesting, me standing there holding three positive tests and him swearing it was impossible."

"Bit fantastic, really," the Doctor agreed happily.

The Master's head felt like his brains were spattered all over the inside of his skull like scrambled eggs in a cocktail shaker. "How did this happen?" he whispered.

The Doctor laughed even harder, then reached out a hand to snag the blonde who looked very likely to just walk right up to him, completely innocent of his identity. The Master smirked. The Doctor smirked right back. "Rose, this is the Master."

"So I was right?" Rose asked, and now she was the one smirking. "One of your people did…"

"Let's put it this way. If someone gave me a choice between this one an' that Dalek downstairs…"

Rose put a hand on the Doctor's face, an absurdly familiar gesture for any human to dare to take with a Time Lord of Gallifrey in front of his underlings and enemies. The Master was torn between amusement and disgust. "It'd be a tough call, I get it," she said in a soft voice like she was gentling a madman.

The Doctor nodded slowly, pressed a kiss into the girl's palm, and then glared balefully at the Master, those icy eyes just daring him to say something as he stood there holding hands with the girl. "Isn't this lovely," the Master exclaimed cheerfully. "The Missus and the ex, how fun is that?"

"You're not the ex," the Doctor snapped.

"So we're still on?" The Master batted his eyelashes at the Doctor. This was a new tactic, but it was fun! One of his guards seemed to think so, too, because he snickered.

"I have better taste in men than you," Rose told the Doctor flippantly.

"I like her," the Master decided. Then, he did a double take. "Wait…"

*

"Just need you to drop us next to th' TARDIS. I'll take care o' the Dalek problem, then Diana here'll fill the base full o' concrete. End of story, no alien museum, no more brain dead geniuses, no more Dalek, no more living outta sync. That all right, or d'ya wanna try to take over the world real quick?"

"Same thing we do every night, Pinkie," Rose muttered. The Doctor grinned at her.

The Master didn't get it, but he had to admit the Doctor's little wife was fun. She was smart and irreverent and he could already tell she gave the Doctor fully as much trouble as, say, the Time Lords ever had. He frowned. "I get to keep Diana," he decided, just to see what they'd say.

"Thanks, I've already played with one megalomaniac," said Diana coldly. "It's all fun and games until somebody loses a life."

The Master pouted. "I haven't killed anybody!" he exclaimed.

Rose made a cough that wasn't a very good disguise at all for the word, "Bullshit."

The Doctor snorted. "Must be, what, a good hour?" he said. "That's gotta be a record for you!"

"Oh, shut up," he snapped. "And get into the TARDIS, the pair of you." He looked at Diana's lithe form and fiercely intelligent eyes. "I've never done the human companion thing," he said, "but for you I'd make an exception."

Diana glared. "I've never done the alien head on my wall thing," she countered. "But yours is certainly decorative enough."

"I'm starting to see the appeal of these human females," the Master commented, cheerfully.

Everyone ignored him. "Doctor, don't you want to take the team with you?" Diana offered. "I know you've tried to keep them off spaceships wherever possible, but most of them have seen some things."

The Doctor shook his head, quite busy with supporting a smiling, but not particularly mobile, Rose. She gave a whole new definition to the words 'great with child'. "Is she having twins?" the Master wondered.

"You'll at least want someone to help arrest him," Diana insisted.

The Doctor looked concerned and pensive, and the Master knew, then and there, that he was up to something. More, the Master was certain he'd never approve. "There's no point."

That was new.

The Doctor smiled beatifically, his blue eyes alive and shining in a way the Master could only just remember from their very distant childhood. "I've always wondered," the Doctor said, "if you don't jus' run because I'll chase you. Some things you've done, they're definitely the utter nightmares of your diseased mind, but so much more of it had to be purely to piss me off."

The Master had honestly never been so frightened in his life.

"So tell me, Koschei," the Doctor said, speaking in Gallifreyan and deliberately choosing that long forgotten name, "if I said I am done with running and you are welcome to stop with me, what would you do?"

The Master stared. "Theta," he answered, in the same language, the only other word for the Doctor he had ever known. He chanced a glance at the blonde girl, saw that pain was contorting her face, wondered if she understood. "Is it time then?" he asked, the words compassing not merely the advent of that child, but of entire worlds of new beginnings.

"You get one chance," the Doctor said, extending his free hand.

Incredibly, his little bride extended hers as well, an offer of such trust and peace written bright as daylight in the simple fact that the Doctor let her. "Come with us," she said, and in Gallifreyan, and she made it such a welcoming, gathering word, inclusive.

Need and hope rang out louder than drums, surrounding him, enfolding him. The Master looked into the inferno eyes of the man who had been everything to him in this life, the very last of his kind, the only other who had ever mattered to him, anyway. He made his choice.

He nodded, and it was done.

The Master took Rose's free arm and together, he and the Doctor led her into his TARDIS. Diana followed, but the Master didn't see fit to put her out. She was a bit mad, Diana, and a bit of a female tyrant, and he liked her.

"I don't get jolts on short hops," the Master said, calmly, "but we'll want to keep close on the controls all the same. My Medbay isn't what it could be, so I'd prefer if we got her to yours."

The Doctor went to the opposite bank of controls, and Rose selected the bank near the door, bracing herself and holding tightly. Diana followed her example, and the Master looked a question at his fellow Time Lord. The Doctor touched three controls, the Master touched three more, and they were off.

*

The sound of drums was incessant, eternal, and much, much worse since the War.

The TARDIS rematerialized without a glitch and the Master automatically ran a trace to try to locate that damnable Dalek. The Doctor's fingers flew over the bank of controls before him. "Still got the VLA armed?" he asked.

"I might've hit it with the TCE," the Master admitted.

"What's the TCE do to a Dalek?" the Doctor wondered, a very curious expression on his face. It was scientific curiosity, the Master realized, genuine interest that piqued that genius brain into action.

"What's a TCE?" Rose wondered.

"He liked miniatures," the Doctor said. "It's called the Tissue Compression Eliminator, though, 'cuz only one person's ever survived the process."

"Lemmee guess," Rose said blandly, "superior Time Lord physiology and all that?"

"Of course," the Master said, shooting her a fetching smile.

"Well, we need ta find that thing and get on, because the owner of the superior Time Lord physiology over here is tired of his surroundings."

The Doctor moved toward her as if automatically, and Rose waved him back, an expression of exasperated fondness lighting up her face. "Diana, hit all those red switches," the Doctor ordered.

"They're silver," the Master added. "He's not color-blind, just forgetful."

"Used to do that to me all the time!" Rose commiserated, and gave the Master a look of such fellow feeling that he couldn't resist grinning at her. Then, she gave a small cry and nearly doubled over.

At this, the Doctor really did rush toward her, not even the need to find that Dalek stopping him. The Master, being closer, reached her first.

Maybe it was jealousy, spite, hate to one, hate of the other. Maybe it was a need every bit as base as hunger or warmth. Maybe they were more insane than he was to even imagine there was any other option than this. Maybe it rage, blood, vengeance, fear. Maybe it was the drums; maybe it was always the drums.

He snatched Rose close, the TCE in his hand and at her temple in an instant. "You bastard," Rose hissed, then groaned as her knees tried to buckle.

"Stand on your feet, pretty, I'll not carry you," the Master said. "No, Doctor!" he ordered, edging toward the doors.

The Master laughed, wicked and unrepentant. "It's never the elaborate traps," he said. "Do your other enemies know? So many people hate you, and she and her kind are your weakness. Life is your weakness, and homes and families and all those things you can never, ever have!"


	3. Flirting With Disaster

"Let her go," the Doctor ordered, in a calm, authoritative voice.

The Master almost considered giving in for a moment, but he had had eons to accustom himself to disobeying even the most potent orders. "Your key, Doctor!" he snapped.

"Fine," the Doctor said, and held up both hands, edging away from the Master's TARDIS console. "Just let Rose go, an' you can have anything you want."

"Did you tell her, Doctor?" the Master demanded, backing out the door. "Did you tell her that you pulled the trigger? Will she let you hold your new child in hands covered with the blood of its siblings? Gallifrey's gone and you're here, and that can only mean…" They were clear of the TARDIS now, the Doctor and Diana standing in its doorway, both looking wholly panicked.

"Let me go, you psychotic son of a bitch, if I wasn't in labor, I'd…"

"Tell her, Doctor!" the Master demanded. "Tell her you're the genocidal maniac who burned down two great civilizations, and for _what_?"

"Give her back to me!"

"Let me go!"

"Let her go!"

"TELL HER!"

_"Exterminate!"_

The fifth voice that joined the chorus of rising panic was wholly unexpected but instantly effective. The Master turned to confront the Time Lords' mortal enemy, meaning to use Rose as a shield as he went. However, she had gotten oddly balanced in the process of fighting her this far, and he lost his grip. Rose began to fall, all the while promising to break him in half if he hurt her child, and flailing to catch herself.

It was the Doctor who caught her, setting her upright and immediately shielding her with his body, apparently determined to come between the Dalek and his family. The thing that truly shocked the Master, though, was that, before he got a good look at what he was facing, the Doctor and Diana both snatched his arms and shoved him down.

Then, Diana stood there with a foot in his back. The Master didn't think he'd been quite this kicked around by women since he and the Rani had gotten stuck… never mind that, now. There was a Dalek on the loose. Assuming they survived, there'd be time for happy reminiscences later.

"If you ever touch her again, I'll break every bone in your body," the Doctor said, quite conversationally. "You know very well I know how."

In his best mocking, pouting voice, the Master quoted, _"The sonic screwdriver's not an offensive weapon."_

"Tell that to your sternum when it shatters in three places," the Doctor replied coolly. "Fought my way through a War on the front lines, you know. Funny the vicious things ya can do with sound waves if you gotta."

Diana's shoe dug into the Master's fourth lumbar vertebra as she hissed at him to shut up.

"Don't bother, Doctor," said Rose in a cold, tired voice. "He's not worth it."

"I'll have you know," the Master began, "I am so worth…"

The Doctor, however, had apparently decided to side with Rose. "I know you're still here!" he called into the shadows of the alien museum. "Show yourself."

"Doc-tor," came the typical mechanical voice.

It was the most annoying thing in the Time War. You could blow up entire planets full of Daleks, set fire to their ships, chase whole battalions of them into black holes, but let one of them catch you, and all they wanted to do was complain about the Doctor.

The Master, quite used to being public enemy number one, wasn't exactly sure how to handle that. However, he supposed there was always the old standby. "You know me, Dalek!" he called. "I've brought you the Doctor as a gift…"

"You are the Master," the Dalek cut him off.

"I am indeed," he agreed. "And we have been allies," he reminded.

Apparently all the standard rules of the entire Universe had gone out for crumpets some time while he was hiding out, and he hadn't been able to read the memo in human form. "You threatened Rose Tyler," the Dalek said.

The Master looked up at the Doctor, only to find the Doctor staring down at him in something that looked very much like shock. "What the hell is this?" the Doctor said.

"I absorbed the DNA of Rose Tyler," the Dalek said.

"I know," said Rose, breathing rather heavily. "You said before, years ago, you extrapolated my DNA."

"I learned," it said.

The Doctor and the Master both turned to stare at Rose. Rose shrugged. "What did you learn?" she asked.

"Loneliness," it answered. Its mechanical voice sounded strange to anyone used to the sound of a Dalek. "So many ideas," it said. "So much darkness."

"What the hell _is_ she?" the Master mouthed at the Doctor. He'd noticed that the girl practically breathed possibilities, but to warp the mind of a Dalek? It was utterly unprecedented, impossible, fantastic.

"Mine," the Doctor mouthed back.

"Come out where I can see you," Rose said. "Let us help you."

"Can I be helped, Rose Tyler?"

Rose smiled, and took a deep breath. "'Course you can," she said, and the Master wanted to tell her she was insane. "I saved your life before, an' you just now saved mine, yeah? That's got to mean something."

"I hope so," said the Dalek.

The Master hoped that the Dalek using that word had given the Doctor a double coronary, because it had certainly come very close to doing so to him.

A small, muted version of the Dalek tracking noise echoed through the shadows of the museum. The Master, terrified and sweating, peered into the darkness. He could almost feel the Doctor nearly vibrating with horror as he stood, immovable, between what was coming and Rose.

The Dalek finally emerged from the shadows and the Master could only stare in utter horror. "What in the hell is that?" he demanded.

The Doctor looked at the foot tall Dalek and exclaimed, gleefully, "Think that's two wrongs makin' a right!"

"But that's impossible!" the Master shouted, throwing Diana off in his haste to scramble to his feet, which she vociferously protested and tried to rectify immediately. He made one mistake in that. He failed to take into account the fact that he was dealing with a terrified, fish-out-of-water Dalek that was already a good solid distance out of its drippy little mind before he shrank it down to the size of a corgi.

The Dalek took one look at his rapid motion toward it, sized him up, and pronounced, simply, _"Exterminate."_

This time, in the Master's distraction, the Dalek finally managed to shoot him.

*

It was all very strange after that. The tiny Dalek's weapon had been powered down in exponential proportion to its size. Effectively, the foot high pepper pot had been able to only stun a full-grown Time Lord at point blank range.

Rose Tyler had adopted the damn thing as a pet. Diana was wholly and vocally against it, and even the Doctor didn't particularly care for the idea, for all that he would concede that the reduced death – now stun – machine had saved his wife's life.

The Doctor had decided that the Master's TARDIS would be remote paralleled to his and hauled off to some undisclosed location, while the Master himself would remain a TARDIS-bound prisoner. "Oh, goody," he'd drolly pronounced this idea. "Uncle Master can read the kiddies bedtime stories about Morbius and Omega and Salyavin."

"Was a good sort, the Professor," the Doctor had said of that last, Salyavin, who had also been known as Professor Kronotos. The Master had grudgingly been forced to agree, if only because he'd once tried to recruit the man to help him conquer the Universe and been treated to a blast of the old man's power. He'd found himself in a Turkish prison with no recollection how he'd gotten there.

"You don't mind if I come, do you?" Diana had asked. "Only, I've nothing else to do, anyway, and I'll be glad to help you keep this one in line."

"Admit it," the Master had teased. "You just find me irresistibly attractive."

They'd had a bit of an argument, which had really gotten the Master's blood flowing. "She's certainly better than that one little git, what was his name?" the Doctor had asked.

"Adam," Rose had supplied. "Ran off back home to his mummy over those Scowlifon thingees."

"Even you were sick," the Doctor had teased.

"Yeah," Rose had agreed. "'Cuz only you had the nose plugs!"

The good-natured banter had continued for a few moments, and Diana had dredged up a pair of handcuffs from somewhere. The Master was required to make crude comments the entire time she tried to put them on him. It was a law.

Then, suddenly, Rose's labor went from slow and mildly painful to quick and excruciating. Her water broke, leaving a large puddle spreading across the floor of the alien museum.

The Doctor leapt into action, shifting gears with blinding speed from saves-the-planet to delivers-the-baby. He got Diana to open the doors and carefully led Rose inside. He even allowed her microscopic Dalek to follow him, probably only because he couldn't figure out how to electrocute it.

The distraction was all the Master needed. He found that either Diana was also resistant to his hypnosis, or he was abysmally out of practice. However, he could still physically overpower her. While the Doctor was getting ready to bring the next generation of persons-the-Time-Lords-would-hate into the world, the Master decided to take Diana (since he was chained to her) and quietly slip away.

It was only when they'd already taken off that he found out she'd let him. He knew that because she now had him handcuffed to his own control console and was telling him so.

"Don't get me wrong, I love the Doctor and Rose a lot," Diana said. "It's just sometimes, someone really deserves something awful to happen to them, and the Doctor hardly ever sees it that way."

"Don't be too sure," the Master said. "Besides, how's your being with me going to help you show him that?"

"Oh, it's not," said Diana. She smiled for the first time since he'd met her, and the Master was utterly enchanted. "It's just, I used to work for the most powerful and dangerous megalomaniac the human race has produced to date." She shrugged artfully. "He disappeared without a trace. It was never explained, but everyone who survived took one lesson from the whole situation."

The Master waved a hand, let her talk, amused by her antics and admiring of her nerve. He'd already decided that he was the only person who had the right to kill Diana, and that he wasn't going to be doing it. She was just a little too… fantastic. "Well?"

"Bad things should happen to bad people." She grinned over the console at him, studying the controls in a very obvious attempt to learn them. "I've decided to be the bad thing that should happen to you."

"Kinky," the Master decided happily.

Diana snorted at him. "You wish."


End file.
